So Anna prompted me to writing. Let's talk about adoption and television.
Once Upon A Time for those who haven't seen it, is the story of how all the fairy tale characters have been put into modern times by a curse from the Evil Queen. Most of them don't remember how they came to Storyville. There are flash backs of life in the fairy tale kingdom to explain character development and plot points to the viewer, but for the most part the characters are ignorant. The true exception is the Evil Queen. She is the town Mayor and controls all. She's also an adoptive mother.
The key to returning to the fairytale world is held with Emma Swann, the child of Snow White and Prince Charming. She was spirited out of fairy tale world right before the curse struck. She's now an adult and a birth mother. Her son, who is now 10 years old, was adopted by (you guessed it) the Evil Queen/Mayor.
The kid is a kind of guide for Emma saving everyone and getting them back to fairy tale land. It's a classic story of good versus evil. Of course, since it's now everything isn't as black and white as you read as a kid. The queen has the occasional streak of humanity, the princess makes the wrong decision here and there.
Modern adoption becomes a major plot point. Henry (the kid) actually searches for and finds his birth mom, Emma. Now he wants to know her to save the kingdom, but he still finds her. She's reluctant at first, stumbles, but then comes into her own with her motherhood. She keeps trying to respect the boundaries of the Mayor, who is Henry's adoptive mother. The problem is that many times these boundaries are not for Henry's good, but to keep everyone from finding out about their past as a fairy tale character. So, sometimes Emma challenges the Mayor.
We usually have one show we try to watch as a family. This fall, we had chosen Once Upon A Time. I didn't realize the adoption angle until we were watching the first episode. My children who are adoptees were indignant that the adoptive mother was portrayed as evil. Why can't both the mothers be good? I pointed out that it's a fairy tale so someone has to be the villain.
I like that the birth mother is the hero. It sometimes reinforces the whole "your own" bullshit, but I can take that. Barb talked about all the reasons she loves Emma, so read her post.
I want to talk about why it really is okay that the adoptive mother is evil. She's evil because of who she is, that's her at the core. She sacrifices whoever gets in her way, even if she loves them. She's not evil because she adopted a child. I think she actually loves Henry as much as she is capable of loving anyone. We see her sacrifice her father (also named Henry) in the first episode. She loves her father, truly, but can't seem to overcome her dark leanings. I think the same is true with her son. She would treat him no differently if she'd given birth to him. She mothers him how she would mother anyone.
I've assured my kids that adoptive parents can handle this portrayal. They see it as a reinforcement of adoption stereotypes. I think we're both right. I think it's important enough to see a birth mother come into her own to keep watching.
We're still watching to see how it unfolds in the end.
I'll talk about Parenthood and Modern Family later this week. Or next.
